Lately i have been thinking a lot on the subject of the Man. most women will throw around the statement to their men or their sons "be a man" So what is a man? Timothy breaks it down when he is taking about an overseer.
Miriam Webster definition-one possessing in high degree the qualities considered distinctive of manhood
so what are this qualities distinctive of manhood i ask myself?
(1) Above reproach(disapproval/disappoint)
A man ought to strive to live his life above reproach, he is not supposed to intentionally disappoint others or his spouse. I use the word intentionally because it is inevitable not to disappoint others because of the different environmental exposures. This takes learning to know what is disappointing to the other person and making informed decisions not to indulge in this so called "disappointing " acts
(2) Husband but of one wife (Faithful)
A man is faithful. I used to think that faithfulness was just physical but faithfulness is mental and emotional too.
(3) Temperate (showing moderation or Self -Restraint)
Many are the times as a man you will want to have structures or have things done in certain ways , or raise your voice e.t.c The ability to show self restraint in areas where it is your every right to react and not act makes you a Man
This is self explanatory
Every man has to be estimable, decent of character and behavior and worthy of respect. Respect is earned and not demanded. Just because you are physically a man does not mean you will be respected. The way you carry yourself and treat those around you, will earn you the respect and high esteem. The culture you come from or your upbringing can be engraved in the material of who you are but it does not mean you cannot learn a new thing or two. Give people around you a reason to respect you for how you are and not because of the titles you bear. Remember; Demanded respect breeds resentment.....
Mostly we look at this from the angle of being able to accommodate people. Today it occurred to me that hospitality spreads to ideas and flaws of the other. Real men are Hospitable, they have an ease or willingness with which they can accept or consider new things. Are you open or Closed minded? Well a Man is open minded.
(7) Able to teach
Teachers are considered the most patient. Think of this Pre-school teacher presented with a child who can barely construct a sentence or write anything. They take their time, deal with all the tantrums and imperfections of this child. I don't know how many of us cried silly the first time they were left with a teacher in school, i know i did, but before long this teacher was the name that flowed out of my mouth with reference to all i did. Teacher said do this, or don't do that or that's not the way teacher said it should be done etc.
Humanly when presented to a stranger or strange environment our very nature reflects on what we have left behind and is remorseful but unless the new environment presents safety and comfort we feel oppressed and caged in but if we find that safety that we had where we are coming from, it is so easy for us to assimilate to our new environment, Ability to teach requires patience and at times stepping down to a level "beneath your normal level" and that makes a Man!
This are but a few of the things that i am learning, that gentleness is not a western ideology or a lesser you, it just means that you are Man enough to sacrifice.
I conclude by saying " no greater love than this that a man should lay down his life for another"
A man is sacrifice,
even when its not worth it,
even when the other person tramples you underfoot,
Every human heart responds to the language of love, and love is birthed out of sacrifice.....
Let us trash all this ideologies of the world about real men!
Let us embrace our manhood and be the leaders we are meant to be.
Be a Man!